I used to think the Romance Goddess was a gorgeous, snarky, sympathetic deity. I’ve changed my mind. Maybe we pissed her off, or maybe she got bored. Whatever the reason, she zapped her earthly underlings (i.e. publishers) with the Generic Spell, resulting in a flood of generic heroines, generic heroes, and totally generic settings.

Like Ms. Dreiling’s debut. I don’t have to talk about Tristan, our ducal hero, or the Regency ton setting because they’re so generic you should know exactly what I’m talking about.

Which leaves the plot, and, you know what, Human Incarnations of Her Worshipfulness? Outlandish plots don’t compensate for generic stories. I don’t care how kooky the setup is. I don’t care how many twists there are. And I sure hell don’t care about a lame-o situation involving Who Wants to Marry a Millionaire, Regency style. A duke wants to marry, so he hires the ton’s matchmaker-du-jour, and they fall in love while he eliminates debutantes after a slew of tests, contests, and questions. That’s not stupid – that’s asinine.

I’ll give credit to the author, who must be drinking an anti-Generic potion, because she manages to insert moments of wit and decent characterization (mostly, but not always, in the form of our matchmaking heroine, Tessa) in the midst of the idiocy and mundane. Then bam! The potion wears off and the spell hits again. Italics! Heavy-handed hints! Uncharacteristic behaviour!

O Priests of Her Celestial Divinity, hear this weary mortal’s plea: Find inspiration, I know not where.

But find it fast.