My Lady Nightingale
Grade : C-

Where, oh where, was Evelyn Richardson's editor? I almost feel guilty reviewing My Lady Nightingale in its present incarnation. The book enjoys the advantages of an unusual premise, an interesting plot, and engaging characters, but it's so sloppily edited that I could not enjoy it at all. I'm tempted to split my grade: B for the story, F for the shape of the text.

Haunted by the horror of war and the loss of close friends, Lord Christian Hatherleigh finds solace in music. On his homecoming, he enters his brother's house and swears he's hearing an angel sing. Actually, it's Mademoiselle Isobel de Montargis, governess and music teacher to his two nieces. Her family is one of the most ancient of the French nobility, but they've been living in exile since the Revolution.

Overly proud of the family heritage, Isobel's father tries to forget it's her meager salary that supports them now - no daughter of the house of de Montargis would stoop so low as to work for money. In addition, he's disowned her brother Auguste for serving in Napoleon's army. And he refuses to consider giving even the most grudging blessing to his daughter's aspiration to become a professional singer, despite her enormous vocal talent.

An inadvertent insult from Christian's brother forces Isobel to quit her job. In an attempt to make it up to her, and as a pretext to continue seeing her, Christian arranges an interview for Isobel with the best voice teacher in London, who agrees to take her on as a pupil. But when the French king returns to France, Isobel's father insists they travel to Paris with the rest of the court. What will happen to her dream of a musical career? Will her father ever reconcile with Auguste? What about the charming, handsome Englishman who understands her as no one else? When Napoleon escapes from Elba, all these questions must wait while the fate of Europe is settled.

The story was interesting, the characters more so. The depiction of Christian suffering a mild case of posttraumatic depression is not a common one in romance fiction, and adds a welcome touch of reality. While Isobel's chafing at her father's restrictions and her reasons for resisting them - the desire to use her artistic talent and her flat-out refusal to go along with his plans for her life - may be more conventional, they work nicely in this story. And the conflict between proud father and pragmatic son is a nice subplot.

That being said, I must address the issue of how poorly the book has been edited. Here's a partial list of errors that detracted from my concentration on the story:

  • Occasional typographical mistakes pop up;
  • Necessary commas are dropped, extraneous commas are added, and when a semi-colon makes a rare appearance it is invariably used improperly;
  • The possessive form of Isobel's family name is especially problematic, appearing in the following variations: de Montargis', de Montargis's, and de Montargises'. Which is it to be? Encountering a single one of these on a consistent basis would be marginally less irritating to the reader; and
  • While I don't speak Italian, I do know French. I encountered several gaffes so basic that I'm willing to bet money I don't have that the proofreader of this manuscript has no knowledge of the language.

The most distracting element of all is the all-too-frequent use of run-on sentences. Here's an example:

"As her voice soared brilliantly to the highest notes, Christian was transported to the music room at Warminster House and the afternoons he had sat gazing into the garden, the pale winter sun gleaming on the parquet floor, and he was struck by a pang of nostalgia which he could not explain until after the concert when the well-wishers and admirers made an impenetrable throng around Isobel and he caught the words "brilliant, exquisite, incomparable," all the words he had used to describe her to Signor Bartoli."

Unhappily, this is not an isolated occurrence, nor even the most egregious example. A blue pencil, wielded judiciously, would have nipped this kind of problem in the bud early in the editing process.

My hope is that Evelyn Richardson enjoys as much success as one of her predecessors in the Regency sub-genre, Mary Jo Putney, and is able to re-tool My Lady Nightingale as a full-fledged historical. The book screams for it. Then she'll have the chance to fix all the technical problems that plague this unusual and, at heart, enjoyable story. Ms. Richardson, get a new editor - you deserve it.

Reviewed by Nora Armstrong
Grade : C-
Book Type: Regency Romance

Sensuality: Kisses

Review Date : October 8, 1999

Publication Date: 1999

Review Tags: 

Recent Comments …

Nora Armstrong

Subscribe
Notify of
guest

1 Comment
newest
oldest most voted
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
1
0
What's your opinion?x
()
x