I always like reading debut novels because sometimes I discover wonderful treasures. Other times, however, I find books that required work they didn’t get before hitting shelves. Sadly, Angela Johnson’s Vow of Seduction is one of the latter.

Underneath all the clunky narration, modern-day psychobabble, and info dumps, what we essentially have is the story of lovers reunited. As the book opens, Lady Katherine of Montclair (she goes by “Kat” – and if you can read this umpteen times in the text without rolling your eyes, you’re a stronger reader than I) rescues Alex de Beaumont from attackers. Despite being only fourteen, Kat is apparently quite the expert with bow and arrow. She also sports cropped hair and dresses like a boy. Oh my, how realistic. And sadly, how unoriginal. I love Medievals, but one downside of reading every one l I can get my hands on is that I have had to suffer through entirely too many “chicks in tights” plots.

At any rate, we soon learn that: (1) Alex is not terribly impressed by Kat’s antics and (2) Kat and Alex are to be betrothed. At this point, the action jumps forward nine years. Kat is now 23, and it is her wedding day. When it becomes clear she is marrying Sir Luc de Joinville rather than Alex, one cannot help wondering what happened. The mystery is solved quickly when Alex bursts into the wedding, proclaiming that Kat cannot marry because she is already his wife.

As it turns out, Kat and Alex had married, enjoyed a flaming hot wedding night, and then Alex went on Crusade. Though presumed dead, Alex was actually a prisoner in Syria, and he has now returned home just in time to thwart his widow’s remarriage. Sounds like it could have been a tension-fraught and interesting set-up, no? Sadly, the story just didn’t live up to its potential.

First we have the narration issues. Much of this story is told rather than shown, which means that the reader never really gets to know the characters well. In addition, shifts in mood and between scenes sometimes get handled awkwardly, making the book feel jerky and a little confusing from time to time.

The characterizations also don’t help here at all. Kat carries herself like a 21st century tomboy, and has not a hint of the Medieval worldview about her at all. Her inner monologue also has a tendency to read like a psych textbook, and this did not make me want to spend much time inside her head. Take this tidbit, for example: “Indeed, Luc’s devotion to her and no other, along with his desire to have children, would assure their lasting happiness. He would never abandon her, as had every other person she had ever cared about.” Coming from a contemporary heroine, this might seem humdrum enough, but this analysis feels glaringly anachronistic coming from a Medieval heroine. The notion that one would choose a marriage partner for love came about only recently in the upper classes, and the idea that one would choose whether or not to have children in one’s marriage is an even more modern development.

And then there’s our hero. One minute he’s acknowledging that it must be a shock for him to return from the dead. However, very soon after making his appearance he’s determined to claim Kat as his. Upon learning that she has thought him dead for six years and therefore moved on with her life, he immediately decides, “My wife is an adulterous whore.” Since we learn around the same time that their unforgettable wedding night involved him tying Kat to the bed so that he could consummate their marriage, I couldn’t help thinking what a jackass Alex was. He’s definitely a tortured hero, but his treatment of Kat and the book’s narrative style make it difficult for readers to truly feel and empathize with his pain.

And then there are the infodumps. You’ll get to learn all about Medieval life from this book, but those morsels of information will be dangled before you in awkward sentences guaranteed to jerk one right out of the narrative. For example, in the wedding scene, the reader moves merrily along, experiencing the shocking reentry of Alex into Kat’s life and then for some reason, it becomes necessary for the reader to know that Kat “wore a barbette and fillet headdress – the barbette a linen band going under the chin and pinned on top of her head and the fillet a crown of stiffened linen.” Well, that sure kept the mood going.

As mentioned above, this book has good bones. The main underlying plot could promise great conflict and a poignant story, particularly if stripped of some of the superfluous melodramatic plot twists that afflict the second half of Vow of Seduction. However, in the hands of one whose writing style still needs more polishing, the result is not one I’d come close to recommending readers add to their own TBR piles.