This Lullaby
Grade : B+

This lullaby is only a few words
A simple run of chords
Quiet here in this spare room
But you can hear it, hear it
Wherever you may go
I will let you down
But this lullaby plays on.

This Lullaby is the song that Remy's father wrote for her when he found out she was born. He never saw her, never visited her. He died when she was two. Remy's song turned out to be her dad's one and only hit, and she's grown up hearing it all her life. Through all the chaos of her eighteen years, during her mother's four (soon to be five) marriages, Remy has heard that song. It's not much of a comfort to her, but it isn't something she can let go of either.

Remy doesn't believe in love, at least not the romantic kind. She's seen too many men come and go and watched her mother's heart break too many times. Remy believes in herself. She's all set to go to Stanford in the fall, and if she can just make it through this summer without any strong attachments, she'll be free and clear to start her new life. She's willing to have a summer fling, but nothing too serious. She knows exactly how to cultivate the right kind of guy and has a great deal of practice in ruthlessly cutting boys off when it looks like things may be getting too involved.

Enter Dexter Jones. Dexter comes into Remy's life with a literal crash, flinging himself down beside her and saying, "I just thought to myself , all of a sudden, that we had something in common. A natural chemistry, if you will. And I had a feeling that something big was going to happen. To both of us. That we were, in fact, meant to be together." What can Remy say to that except, "Get lost."? Fortunately, Dexter doesn't take the hint. He is as persistently loving as a puppy, challenging Remy in every way, but most importantly in how she looks at love.

Remy is rather prickly. She's cynical and bitter and sometimes bitchy and cold. And she's entirely unrepentant. When the predetermined time comes for her to end her current relationship, she wonders idly what kind of breakup this will be. Will he be angry or will he break down and cry? Not that it matters; the end result is all she's interested in. It's completely understandable why Remy is this way, however. Her family life has been in a constant state of transition since before she was born. Her mother is a flake and a half, floating in and out of marriage, seemingly unaware of how her various relationships affect her children socially, emotionally, or financially. Also, Remy was raped at a party when she was a sophomore. That experience precipitated a binge of drug and alcohol abuse as well as a spate of sleeping around. But now she's back on track. She's focused. Until Dexter shakes her up.

The book has a melancholy feel to it because of Remy's pessimistic point of view. But just about the time I was getting thoroughly sick of Remy's cynical, self-destructive behavior, Dexter would come bounding back on the scene with all of his boyish exuberance and lighten things up. He was a fantastic character, so true to life. The young adult fiction market is a fairly flexible one in terms of writing freedom, and, since this is a YA novel, Dessen is free to make her hero very imperfect. Dexter is skinny and clumsy and gawky. He has a mop of brown curls that are always in his face or sticking straight up. He has no money. He and his friends have formed the band Truth Squad. He quit college to be a musician, and now they tour and hope for a record deal. The scenes where Remy watches Dexter and his bandmates interact were so right on. These boys talked and acted like my guy friends in college - right down to their malnourished diets and disgusting hygiene. Dexter is impractical and high energy. He has trouble paying attention. But he's charming as all get out as well as incredibly generous and patient emotionally. He is what Remy needs even if Remy can't see it.

This is not a book for young teens. It has a very chick lit type feel to it, in fact. There are references to drugs. Remy and her friends drink and sometimes get drunk. The language is a little rough, and all the characters seem to equate dating with sex. Older teens will likely relate to it, however. Dessen has a great deal of empathy for this transitory period of life.

The book's message is about jumping into life even though there are no guarantees. Remy doesn't want to commit to anything she sees as having no chance of success, and love heads up that list. How she learns to open herself up to life and love is very touching. This book doesn't have a standard HEA ending, though. Dexter and Remy are still too young to fully commit. But it does end happily with hope for the two of them and for Remy especially.

This Lullaby came thisclose to being a DIK read for me. If not for its overarching melancholy feel, it would be. It's beautifully written with all the minutiae of daily life that makes good fiction compelling. Dessen is a fabulous writer, and her characters are so slice-of-life that they seem like people I know. The book also offers a great deal of food for thought. When I finished it, I wanted to start all over and read it again more slowly to soak in the lyrical writing and the symbolism. If that's not a recommendation, I don't know what is.

Reviewed by Rachel Potter
Grade : B+
Book Type: Young Adult

Sensuality: Subtle

Review Date : August 30, 2002

Publication Date: 2004

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