True to my sanguine personality, I love to share my experiences and always hold out the hope that someone else will share equally so that we can make a party of it. If I’m excited about an upcoming trip or moved by a new-found musician or wowed by a recently released movie , I want to tell others. Within my circle of friends and family, I am very fortunate to have those who encourage my sharing of such things and give their own thoughts in return. However, when it comes to talking about the extremely moving historical romance book I finished last night or the impressive vampire romance series I’m reading or the hilarious romantic audio book that entertained me so thoroughly over the thump, thump, thump of my treadmill – well – there’s no family, friend, or neighbor with any interest whatsoever in the genre (as far as I know). So, I sometimes reflect on what fun it could be to have just one person close by who loves reading romance and enjoys talking about it.
For most of my life, I have freely shared my thoughts with others concerning the latest book I’d read and happily loaned out my treasured finds all while eagerly seeking out recommendations from others. But I now think of those years as my “pre-romance stage” which ended about eight years ago when I, quite frankly, became addicted to romance. With that new phase in my reading life came the inevitable loss of any discussion about books such as Penelope Williamson’s Keeper of the Dream or Rachel Gibson’s Tangled Up in You with those around me. Gone are the days when a book sitting on my den side table invited discussion such as Arthur Golden’s Memoirs of a Geisha or Tom Clancy’s Debt of Honor although I was able to spark a bit of interaction with Doris Kearns Goodwin’s Team of Rivals last year. It’s not so much that general fiction and non-fiction books are no longer a part of my life. I do occasionally read outside of the romance genre but not as much as I once did (due to issues with light) and I strongly prefer to spend my time reading a book I know I will love. Since I understand how to navigate the system to find romances to my liking, my odds of success in choosing a romance are probably 4 out of 5. Therefore it’s unlikely that any book, other than a romance, will now be found on my den side table.
Wishing for a close-by romance buddy for a bit of one-on-one discussion about our latest romance success or failure seems almost like a dream request. Fortunately since I discovered AAR with all its discussions, reviews, and varied features seven years ago, I don’t spend a lot of time missing the romance friend I’ve never had. But the fact remains, I love to talk about the books I’m reading and having a romance reading neighbor could be such a blast!
Lately I’ve found myself shyly looking around as I browse local bookstores to see who is searching the romance section with me. More than once I have wanted to say “I read that book” or “I wrote a review for AAR on that book in your hands – let me tell you about it.” I glance at the books they are buying but stay quiet and attempt to respect their privacy. But it encourages me all the same to know there are many other women in my hometown who love romance as I do. And since I think most attempt to hide the fact that they are romance readers, the real task I’m presented with is discovering just who of my current friends is already a romance fan.
Oh, the conversations I could have with my romance reading neighbor and the questions I could ask. What bookstores have the best romance selections and do their clerks treat you with respect? Do you know of any stores that put new releases out a little early on occasion? What is the best used book store for romance and where are the best prices? And last but not least – do you want to borrow this book when I finish reading it?
Being a part of AAR’s community is very fulfilling and I wouldn’t change that for the world But, oh, for the freedom to say to another as I head out for my neighborhood walk “Have you read…?” or “I’ve got a book you will just love!”
Now for your thoughts:
Do you have a friend who lives close-by to share your love of romance?
How did you discover your romance friend?
How do online romance communities fulfill your need to talk about romance?
-Lea Hensley
Очуметь просто! Все, блин, всё знают, кроме меня :)
Очуметь просто! Все, блин, всё знают, кроме меня :)
Wow, I can’t believe that this topic has come up! I live in a small town in Australia and there is almost no access to a decent romance reading selection. I have come up with an idea for a romance book lending business rather than a romance book store in town as the cost of books here are so expensive. My husband would like me to try and do an online business but I have explained to him that my goal is to create greater access to books for women that read romance as well as a great community feel where women can come and select and read a book without that self-conscious/embarrassed feeling you usually get at a check out as well as a place that we can get together and enjoy. Romance reading is such like a secret society. I have taken the plunge in recent years and just say to any friends I like to read romance. Its amazing the number of people that have replied “”really! me too!”” Once the secret is out in the open there is nothing to fear:) My husband said “”is there really that many people that read romance?”” YES! As mentioned in other posts you always see women in the romance section (in my area desperately looking for something they want to read and not just what has been made availabe) and the few books in the library are alway checked out and reserved for ages! On top of that they sometimes only offer 1 or 2 books out of a series. I have resorted to online ordering and already loan most of my books out but I know that if given the opportunity the community in my area would only grow. So, I totally sympathise will all you ladies looking for a romance reading friend.
Wow, I can’t believe that this topic has come up! I live in a small town in Australia and there is almost no access to a decent romance reading selection. I have come up with an idea for a romance book lending business rather than a romance book store in town as the cost of books here are so expensive. My husband would like me to try and do an online business but I have explained to him that my goal is to create greater access to books for women that read romance as well as a great community feel where women can come and select and read a book without that self-conscious/embarrassed feeling you usually get at a check out as well as a place that we can get together and enjoy. Romance reading is such like a secret society. I have taken the plunge in recent years and just say to any friends I like to read romance. Its amazing the number of people that have replied “”really! me too!”” Once the secret is out in the open there is nothing to fear:) My husband said “”is there really that many people that read romance?”” YES! As mentioned in other posts you always see women in the romance section (in my area desperately looking for something they want to read and not just what has been made availabe) and the few books in the library are alway checked out and reserved for ages! On top of that they sometimes only offer 1 or 2 books out of a series. I have resorted to online ordering and already loan most of my books out but I know that if given the opportunity the community in my area would only grow. So, I totally sympathise will all you ladies looking for a romance reading friend.
Wow, this couldn’t be more true. I’m an army officer stationed in Iraq and I cannot describe the looks I get from my husband when I start telling him about the latest book I’m reading. As an officer, I’m supposed to read things that are ‘professional development’. Like Black Hawk Down. But when I’m in the gym with a little bit of escaping fantasy, I’m dismissed for reading anything that deals with a little romance. It irritates me. While I AM reading Black Hawk Down, I’m also reading Sherry Thomas’s Not Quite a Husband. I refuse to hide the cover of either book or my enjoyment of them, either. I wish I had someone to talk to about the latest and greatest coming out from fav authors, but alas, I must limit myself to online chats and my blog.
Thanks for a great post!
Wow, this couldn’t be more true. I’m an army officer stationed in Iraq and I cannot describe the looks I get from my husband when I start telling him about the latest book I’m reading. As an officer, I’m supposed to read things that are ‘professional development’. Like Black Hawk Down. But when I’m in the gym with a little bit of escaping fantasy, I’m dismissed for reading anything that deals with a little romance. It irritates me. While I AM reading Black Hawk Down, I’m also reading Sherry Thomas’s Not Quite a Husband. I refuse to hide the cover of either book or my enjoyment of them, either. I wish I had someone to talk to about the latest and greatest coming out from fav authors, but alas, I must limit myself to online chats and my blog.
Thanks for a great post!
Lea, Yes, it’s a lot of fun. In fact, it is the one thing that sort of bonded us together. We can discuss books with such enjoyment, and throw in a glass of wine or 2 (or 3) and it’s a party. She reads much more than I do, and only romance (although she did whip through the Twilight series in 3 days) so she usually has several books on hand to give me. It’s a treat!
Lea, Yes, it’s a lot of fun. In fact, it is the one thing that sort of bonded us together. We can discuss books with such enjoyment, and throw in a glass of wine or 2 (or 3) and it’s a party. She reads much more than I do, and only romance (although she did whip through the Twilight series in 3 days) so she usually has several books on hand to give me. It’s a treat!
I never heard about Shelfari! I will definitely check it out and try to set it up, Thanks :)
I never heard about Shelfari! I will definitely check it out and try to set it up, Thanks :)
I really enjoyed all the posts. I just got back into the romance books. I totally relate to people said that when buying or requesting some of the romance authors that you get treated differently I have a friend that reads ONLY murder mysteries, to be honest I got bored with them. Needed some spark in my life I just purchased Mary Jo Putney’s new book and it is really good so far. I also purchased Sookie’s Vampire books and JR Wards first two, am somewhat unsure about these because I couldn’t get through Twilight. Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated. I would love to share!
Steph
I really enjoyed all the posts. I just got back into the romance books. I totally relate to people said that when buying or requesting some of the romance authors that you get treated differently I have a friend that reads ONLY murder mysteries, to be honest I got bored with them. Needed some spark in my life I just purchased Mary Jo Putney’s new book and it is really good so far. I also purchased Sookie’s Vampire books and JR Wards first two, am somewhat unsure about these because I couldn’t get through Twilight. Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated. I would love to share!
Steph